Situation Not Normal, All Trumped Up (SNNATU)

A Limerick Sampler

What is this? Naked woman, men's heads, drawing by William Eaton, 2017It all began in May with a few limericks about Mike Pence, who has seemed at times on the verge of replacing Trump. By August 19, the collection of poems exceeded 90, and comprised many subjects, including my suffering heart. Below is a selection: the limericks most focused on Trump.



Kim Jong-un found his blustering much less attractive

After we deployed our weapon the most radioactive—

After the Donald and his mop

On Pyongyang were gently dropped.

The crowds, the last tweet reads, have been “fantastic.”




For appearances, ads, conversation—

The sad game has a name—dissimulation.

Should I too honest be,

What will people think of me?

To be Trumped is the fate of the nation.



Russians, we know, tried to swing the election

And met many Trump allies with little discretion.

About all we don’t know—

The specific quid pro quo

And the limits to Ryan’s corruption.



From their pool across their lawn the humans dripping pawed,

A grill cover from a woodchuck to violently withdraw.

He knew little of cooking, even less of crime,

But the cover’s burnished red was pleasing to his eye,

And like Donald Trump he thought—strong teeth are nine-tenths of the law.



Pence prayed to the gods of Mueller:

“Please find a way to make me the ruler.

To Russians and abortion

I prefer discrimination and donations

And guns in the laps of preschoolers.”

N.B.: The name being pronounced « muller », perhaps Pence really wished to be made duller?



Snip from (rotated) drawing of Maria (fish pose), 14 June 2017, ASL, modern dance night, based on charcoal drawing by William EatonGaia she whispered to me,

“I can take a few more degrees,

If this puts under water

All these human monsters

Who care less for their children than me.”

News: Trump withdraws US government from Paris climate agreement



He’s “a good guy,” Trump said of his Flynn,

A liar and traitor—a good partner in sin.

He’s “a good guy,” Mr. Comey replied,

Understanding too well—they three were combined.

In dreams another “good” holds goodness within.



In Macbeth a strong man is by his own crimes laid low.

He too frightened and too vulnerable, his kingdom overthrown.

Some say that so the Donald can only watch TV

And put on weight and tweet away, a specter of a he.

A warning to all graspers deceitful? Would that this were so!



A child from whom nourishing love is withheld

May to rougher relations find himself compelled—

Inveighing, gainsaying, affraying, foul playing,

A heart-warming friction thereby surveying.

Yet the first pain, and the emptiness, will not be expelled.



The house is commodious

“Mr. President” melodious

Should the Pences move early

Many Trumps will be surly

And Russians no longer sui generous



Man with fence-like stomach, pen drawing in the dark, by William EatonIf a system can elect a President incompetent and unstable,

Is the system for electronic times no longer suitable?

Or are we again learning—flaws fundamental—

Celebrated rights and checks less legal than financial,

With our public resources ever enriching the venal

And public-trust-worthy chiefs and lawgivers more rare than exceptional?



By aggressors ruthless, results unexpected

The lives of many countries have been deflected

From Russia we’ve been sent a feckless leader

As Germans once east sent comrade Vladímir

Extraordinary actions—sequelae long regretted?



What matters is loyalty, not talent, we know,

And Trump the limits poignantly shows.

Of children and employees

It’s loyalty, loyalty,

Until under the next bus they’re thrown.



The twenty-fifth amendment states

The impeachment need hardly wait

Just a vote of the cabinet

Saying Trump’s too out of it

And the House Mr. Pence levitates



Just seventy-five self-absorbed years ago

With Allies the US united to raze the globe

The Nazis and murderous others were vigorously suppressed

Humane rights and humane structures were loudly professed

But now allies the US needs its own savagery to slow




Mary 54th Street, slightly comic, May 2017, pen and litho crayon, by William Eaton, 2017If you of covfefe a limerick can’t make,

Your limericking license must be a fake.

This special code word,

More sad than absurd,

Means “shut the fuck up for God’s sake!”



Obstruction of justice—impeachable offense

Very good for the friends of one Mr. Pence

Comey and Congress willing

The Oval Office they’ll be filling

Donald littering the forests of Smolensk


— William Eaton

Drawings (more decoration than illustration) are also by William Eaton. Do two of them suggest that some confusions regarding sexual orientation may be contributing to the current mess? Yes.

William Eaton is an essayist, aphorist, poet of a sort, and the Editor of the intellectual journal Zeteo. A collection of his essays, Surviving the Twenty-First Century, was published in 2015 by Serving House Books. Readers of the present piece might also be interested in Ameraiku, or in Trump, de Tocqueville, Democracy, Materialism, or This is my poem for Terminal B.

To read the whole limerick collection to date, see The Limericks (pdf); or the two Montaigbakhtinian posts: The Limericks, Part II (Injustice, Trump, Illness, Poetry) and Part I

(Pence, Trump, Mueller, Capitalism). Note that in these posts many of the limericks comes with additional information from various media.


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Situation Not Normal, All Trumped Up (SNNATU)

Categories: Poems, The Real World

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